Relationships can be really hard sometimes. There are stressors, long-standing disagreements, and sometimes you just need to vent.
But, what if you’re venting in a group setting? Sometimes, in front of your partner?
Well, friends… it’s not good.
When you speak negatively about your partner in public, it creates an “us” (you and your friends/family) vs. “them” (your partner) dynamic. They may feel unsupported, disconnected, and even bullied. These are likely not the feelings you’re looking to elicit in your partner!
If there’s an unresolved issue plaguing your relationship, start with your partner. Invite them to have a constructive conversation and work towards understanding one another and resolving the issue. A lot of couples struggle with this, which is why they talk to friends and family members about the problem instead. If you find yourself avoiding these conversations, that’s a sign you and your partner could use some concrete support and strategies in how to communicate to actually resolve conflict.
Enrollment is currently closed for our online course, Conflict to Connection: The Most Effective Way To Resolve Problems For Good. If you’d like to be notified when enrollment opens again, join our wait list here.
If you do choose to speak with a friend or family member, be mindful of how you approach the discussion. Focus on YOURSELF. Talk about how YOU feel, what YOU need, and brainstorm how YOU may go about approaching it with your partner. (Notice, we didn’t say - vent about all the things your partner is doing “wrong” to this friend). Keep the focus on your side of the street and seek support. Then, circle back to approach the issue with your partner directly.
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